Tuesday, April 7, 2015

Ten Things

I have a lot less free time since James was born. Obviously. Everyone says that happens with a baby and it's totally, weirdly true how my time has been sucked into the void. It helps that spring is here and there is more daylight in the evening, and it especially helps that we put James to bed by 6 pm. (I know that seems really early but it totally works. When we put him to bed later he is up more often during the night, and I think he really wants it. He starts getting fussy by 5:45 and is rubbing his eyes the minute his little head hits the crib).

It's so so nice to have that evening time but by 8:30 I'm exhausted and Chris and I are usually in bed by 9:30. So there's really not a ton of available time, not to mention time where I feel rested and have a desire to work on things.

I used to get up a little early and work on the computer or sit at our office window and write about all of my ideas. And I would use some time in the evening to do the same thing. But our little nursery/office second bedroom houses my art supplies, work table, camera and computer (along with James' mini nursery) and when he's in there sleeping, I can't work on anything. Which leaves the weekends- but those get filled so quickly with to-do lists, visits and fun things. And I am not yet at the point where I will trade an hour of good sleep to get up early and read my favorite blogs. No way.

So I started writing down just ten things when I have a few minutes and it's helped me, a lot. It's faster than a full blog post and helps me get more things down on paper than a typical rambling journal entry. It allows me to write down my stresses and concerns, but also my inspirations, random little thoughts and positive things as well. Tonight I'm sitting on the couch with the doors and windows open listening to the birds. Chris and Clover (my husband and doggie) are out on a long walk so that I can have some cherished alone/work time. And I'm borrowing his lap top.

Ten Things

1. Buy a lap top

2. This quote,

"Be vulnerable.
Let yourself be deeply seen,
love with your whole heart,
practice gratitude and joy…be able to say ‘I am thankful to feel this vulnerable because it means I am alive’,
and believe ‘I am enough.’
You are worthy of love & belonging.
"

Brene Brown, The Power of Vulnerability (via A Well Travelled Woman and tblaberge)

I practice a lot of gratitude. I've always been good at taking the time to slow down and notice what's around me, and to be thankful for the little and good things. But I think something I've been missing in the past few years is practicing joy. Allowing myself to totally be in the moment and be really happy, and not hold back that Joy because of fear, stress or empathy for people who are less fortunate. 


3. I'm in the last quarter of the school year and my intention is to say No as little as possible to the kiddos. They know the deal with art, they have plenty of ideas, my job is to provide the framework of a lesson, materials and some tips and then let them explore and create. Who cares if they make a portrait of Michael Jackson for the billionth time or their rocket blasters aren't collaged or they take the entire hour to cut out a heart and draw a princess on it.


4. This post on Capricous Yogi,
"I made the conscious decision to go from thinking “this is going to happen” to “this is happening.”"
 So I started thinking that way about opening a bakery. "I will open a gf bakery" to "I am opening a gf bakery". And poof, it feels more real, something to take ownership of and stay committed to. 
 
5. What is my spirit animal? How do you know?
 6. Money is tight but I really want to get my hair colored, get another hair cut and get a mani-pedi. And a massage, and a facial. I'm in serious need of a spa-day makeover. 
7. I envision what my bakery will look like ALL THE TIME and I feel it in my bones that it should and will happen.
8. Yet I often still think of other lives that I want to lead. Like owning a farm with chickens and goats and dying my own fabric then sewing it into dresses and bags (Basically the life of Jenna Rose).
9. Having a baby makes me a lot more afraid of him getting sick, hurt or dying. I try not to give those thoughts and fears too much energy, but I think they are here to stay, just lying dormant. 
9.  aand James woke up.  

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